After recently getting into a somewhat heavy political discussion with a friend I realize that politics, like religion, is best not discussed with friends when your opinions diverge from a common point of view.  I particularly feel that when falling on the conservative side of the debate one better keep their mouth shut.  I don’t think anyone necessarily means to make a person feel that way, but I have felt, at least in my experience, that the liberal view comes like an attack and not getting into it is probably best.  I don’t feel I am a particularly judgmental person, but somehow my conservative leanings need to be questioned, dissected, and smacked around.  It’s not that I don’t have an answer, or reason for my beliefs, it is just that the opposing view can’t seem to shake that somehow my opinion differs, and that I am not bringing the Western World down by not agreeing.  I have never questioned and argued with someone the way that I have been interrogated before, this was far from the first time it has happened or the only person who has placed me in the hot seat.  Take for example liberal celebrities that take award show moments to wax political, yes, it is often liberals who choose those moments for browbeating and chest-thumping their view, and their causes.  I don’t know why liberals tend to be louder, and more aggressive, but as a conservative you cannot afford to be loud or aggressive it often seems, and must apologize for your views, because it is obviously wrong, crazy, and mixed-up .  So, I conclude it is best to keep politics out of friendships, it just makes things more peaceful, despite political debate not being a bad thing, it just saves on frustration.

K

Since today is Mother’s Day I have been thinking a great deal about family, parents in particular.


A dear friend of mine recently lost her mother, and the loss she has experienced seems completely overwhelming and indescribable.  Seeing what she is going through got me wondering about mother/daughter relationships.   Recalling what my parents went through when the lost their mothers was a sobering experience, despite the years removed from those losses.  Any parent/child relationship is going to be different and unique, even among siblings and their parents. The capacity to love is something that words really can never truly express adequately.


I have heard that mothers love their child before they even give birth, while fathers don’t feel the same connection until the child is actually born.  Obviously, the child as an infant needs the parent, and the bond that needs to form is delicate and amazing to watch.  As childhood passes, it seems to change and grow with the child needing the parent less and less, so they think.  It seems once the parent is sick, or has passed, the need for the parent/child bond becomes more evident and the loss can be shattering to the spirit.

The closest I came to learning how devastating losing a parent could potentially be was in 2005 when my father had a quadruple bypass.  He recovered and has been okay since, but the time we waited from December 2004 until his surgery in early January 2005 gave me time to think about what could go wrong.  The day of his surgery was a blur, I seemed to live it but somehow not really feel it.  Time that day did not move, and it was one of the longest days of my life.  I still remember the numb feeling of seeing my father intubated, and post-op.  It will never rank as a memory I want to maintain, since the fear became all to real.  It is a close as I ever want to come for a very long time and has made me appreciate every moment.


For as much as a parent can drive a child crazy when the teenage years start and beyond, and vice versa, it seems one is never truly a grown up.  I don’t truly believe we fill that “grown-up” roll until our parents are gone.  Despite living a life of our own, needing a parent never quite seems to end.


Happy Mother’s Day to all the Moms out there! 

K