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Without a Trace

One of the hardest lessons I have had to learn this year is that you might wake up one day and realize you meant nothing to someone.  You invested your time and your emotions in the relationship, and like that they suddenly have no use for you.  It is hard for someone like me to wrap my head around that change in feelings in someone else.  Suddenly you mean nothing to them, you basically do not exist at all in their world now.  Sometimes it can happen because you’ve done something outright to cause it; other times it seems to just be the weight of things you didn’t even realize had ticked them off apparently, until it was too late.  I go though the ups and downs of dealing with this realization every single time it has happened.  I feel so adrift when it happens, and at a loss for how to set my world right again.  The saddest part in all that is knowing that the other person hasn’t probably thought once about me, given me a moments regret, and yet here I am “grieving” for the relationship lost.  Seems this lesson should have been drilled in by now, but I keep somehow forgetting just how much pain it causes, and sometimes how long that pain can last.

K

 

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